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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24729667">How to explain asexuality to your clueless partner from the 21st century</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat217/pseuds/Kat217'>Kat217</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Adventures of Asexual Doctor and Rose [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Who, Doctor Who &amp; Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Asexual Character, Asexual Doctor (Doctor Who), Asexual Relationship, Cuddles, Educational fic, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, I'm so tired of this, No Smut, Novice writer, The characters are slightly out of character I think, no beta we die, still learning, vent fic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 02:34:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,682</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24729667</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat217/pseuds/Kat217</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor and Rose are in a happy, newly made relationship that has been going well. Except Rose has been making advances towards the Doctor that has been making him feel uncomfortable, but he doesn’t know how to explain to Rose what he is. He’s afraid that she won’t understand and leave him. It isn't Rose's usual behaviour when it come's to stuff like that but she’s from the early 21st century, he knows how unaccepting people are from that century. He's still horribly terrified of her reaction.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler, The Doctor (Doctor Who) &amp; Rose Tyler, The Doctor (Doctor Who)/Rose Tyler</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Adventures of Asexual Doctor and Rose [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1788085</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>How to explain asexuality to your clueless partner from the 21st century</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Really, I just got tired of people miss-using the word asexual in their Doctor Who fic, so here I am pretty much making a vent fic, an educational fic and a shipping fic all in one.</p><p>Characters might be slightly ooc btw, terribly sorry about that, I was mostly focusing on explaining asexuality as best as I could . I'm still learning how to write well. Also this fic is a bit bumpy at the start, but I think it gets better towards the end.</p><p>I am a sex repulsed asexual so I totally understand what I made the Doctor go through in this fanfiction. Some asexuals do not have the same experiences as the Doctor. Every asexual is different and have different experiences.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The Doctor knew this was going to happen. He knew it was going to happen and he didn't prepare for it. He should've known she would make advances towards him, he should've prepared an excuse. All he could come up with is that he wasn't ready. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He doesn't really think she'll fall for that for long, he's 900 years old, and he did say that he "dances" not too long ago. He may have lied just a tiny little bit about that. So, after he said that, he ran away as fast as he could to his own room in the TARDIS. Not without seeing her fall into hurt,it made him feel so guilty but he was such a coward. He knew he couldn't bring himself to do it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He'll have to explain to Rose what he is, that he's asexual. He doesn't really know how though, how do you explain asexuality to an early 21st century woman? Even if they were starting to get accepting during that time, there were a lot of misconceptions about asexuality and even aromantics during that time. He knows he'll have to mention aro's in his explanation, even though he isn't aromantic himself. While asexuals and aromantics aren't the same, their community is very connected, and the times their label has been confused for the other is very often.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He planned on what he was going to say, should he ramble like he usual does? He realizes that wouldn't be the best way because she does tend to tune out when he rambles. He wants her to understand him as much as possible. He wants her to know that he loves her very much, despite his asexuality. He hopes she will listen, and if she does want to break up.. well he wouldn't blame her..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He'll have to go the simple approach. Tell her he's asexual, and then answer her questions, as calm as he can. Some of her questions might hurt but it's important for her to ask all she needs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He isn't ready for this, he's never really told anyone about this. Not even his wife, as she was never really interested in that type of stuff, like most Time Lords. Unlike what most people think, Gallifreyans aren't asexual, it's just Time Lords would rather not do all that messy stuff and believe they are much better then that. They'd rather feel superior and ignore their sexual attraction and desires. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He sighed heavily, as the TARDIS gave him a mental push to go see Rose as she was starting to get worried about him. He slowly got up from on-top of his bed, and opened the door. He walked slowly, trying to delay the inevitable, to the control room. She was probably there waiting for him to give her an explanation. As she knew he couldn't keep any secrets around her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He arrived at the control room, and saw her. She looked pretty as ever but she had a very worried stance. He fidgeted with his hands. As he saw her, his nervousness increased and he was starting to go back into fight or flight mode. He pushed it down as best as could and he reproached her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Doctor." She whispered, as she shifted her gaze towards his face. He motioned towards the beige couch for her to do and he joined her. He swallowed, as his nervousness was getting to almost uncontrollable levels.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Uh, Rose, we need to talk." He declared with a quivering tone. She looked almost panicked, as she assumed the meaning behind his words.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're.. going to break up with me right? Did I do something wrong?" Confusion and shock dripped from her voice, and the Doctor's eyes widened.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"NO, no Rose that's not what I meant. I mean, you did do something that made me uncomfortable and I want to talk to you about that!" He quickly told her, "but I won't break up with you! Though.. you might want to, after what I tell you.." He fidgeted with his shirt and looked down. Rose looked at him worriedly, and softly grabbed his shoulder to make him look at her. His eyes were avoiding her gaze.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Doctor, tell me. What is it that you need to tell me? I'm guessing it has something to do with the thing I did, right? When you ran away from me?" He nodded slowly, still not meeting her eyes. He swallowed again but this time it was easier to speak. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I.. I just wanted to tell you that I'm asexual. You can ask me all the questions you need." Rose looked shocked at his answer. She looked at him to see if he was joking. His face was serious.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Is.. isn't that from biology?? Like how some species and plants reproduce asexuallly. You can split in half?" The Doctor looked horrified at that. He knew she was gonna ask that but he was still not prepared for it. Rose noticed from his horrified face that, it was definitely not something he does.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"No, I can't split in half. Weeeeell technically… wait no nevermind, it's not exactly the same thing. Anyway, someone who is asexual is someone who doesn't feel sexual attraction, and asexuality is what people call an umbrella term. For people who fall under the asexual spectrum. There are many different terms and definitions for this who fall on it." He explained to her. Rose still looked confused and even a little hurt at what he said.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"So you don't love me? I mean, if you don't feel attracted to me.." She trailed off. The Doctor looked sad at that, and he hugged her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Rose Tyler. I love you very much, to the end of the universe and back. I love you so much that I don't know what to do with myself sometimes. I just, don't feel sexually attracted to you. I still feel romantically attracted to you, and aesthetic attracted, and sensually attracted. I'm attracted to you in every possible way, except sexually." He rambled on. He still looked nervous but, holding the love of his life is helping him. He finally met her gaze, and she seemed to be less confused. He grinned at her. "You can love someone without being sexually attracted to them, you can even love someone without being romantically attracted to them. Some people don't feel any romantic attraction, but they can still love someone. Just lacking something we both have." He stopped to let her process what he was saying. She nodded in understanding but she still had a few questions before they went and did their normal activities.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Does that mean asexuals have sex. I mean, if they don't feel sexual attraction, it must mean that don't have sex right?" She asked, not in an impolite way. He shook his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Now that isn't true. May asexuals do not have sex, now that is true! But asexuality is not the same thing as being celibate. Some asexuals aren't even virgins. I'm not a virgin! I tried it to see what people were all freaking out about. Let's just say I regret it. Anyway, asexuals sometimes fall in love with someone who is considered to be allosexual, someone who feels sexual attraction, like you. And some asexuals want to please their allosexual partner to make them happy, even if they don't want to. Though I wouldn't recommend being in a relationship like that, they can be toxic for everyone involved." He warned her, even though she probably won't stay with him. She looked at him with understanding and love in her eyes, though he didn't notice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Now some asexuals even like sex! They like having sex with their partner and they like the feel of it. They are still asexual, because even if their involved in a sexual relationship, they can still be asexual. And that confuses a lot of people, because most people are like, well if you aren't attracted to them, then why would you have sex with them? And it's simply because asexuals can still have a libido, or want to please their partner, because they aren't uncomfortable with it." He told her, and she nodded in understanding. It made sense to her, even if it is still a bit confusing to her, she understands it. And anyway, who was she to tell someone what they can and can't do in their relationship.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"I get it! I'm guessing with how uncomfortable you were with my advances, that you are one of those who aren't so keen on those nightly activities, right?" She questioned, as she looked at him lovingly. He smiled at her, one of his true smiles, and he nodded.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"You're correct! Most of those activities make me extremely uncomfortable. Is it okay if I tell you what I'm okay and not okay with? Unless you want to break up with me.. which is totally understandable." She looked at him and realized why he looked so nervous. Oh she was so oblivious. She tightened her hug on him and laid her head on his arm.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Oh no, I really don't want to break up. I'm totally fine if you don't want to do any of that. I do feel attracted to you in that way and some things might be.. uuh… difficult. But you can tell me when I'm making you uncomfortable, okay?" He let go of her and gave her an answering smile so bright, so full of love for her that she doesn't know how she deserved him. She almost had tears in her eyes, and she smiled back just as brightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Can we talk about that later, though? Right now I want to cuddle with you and kiss you and sleep." She asked him, and he nodded, still smiling brightly, as he took hold of her again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The TARDIS lowered the brightness of the let's as she felt the couple's love and happiness surround her console. She felt happy for her Thief and her Wolf. Both of them together, in the TARDIS as it should be.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm a novice writer so my writing is still not the best, and my first language isn't English. (Well, technically I suck at more at my first language but I still suck at English)</p><p>Criticism is welcome, flames are not. Have a lovely day!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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